In this exact moment, what seems to be the problem? Can you show me here it hurts?
Money issues? I hear you. But right now, if you could triple the money in your bank account, what good would it do you? Would you be reading this on a bigger screen? Would you be sitting in a bigger house while Morgan Freeman reads it to you? In the Here and Now, is money really the problem? Or is it your anxiety about money, the story you tell yourself about what might happen in the future?
Or maybe you’re working through relationship challenges. Life would be so much better If you just had the right partner, or if your current partner could just work on this and this and . . . But exactly right now, where is your partner? If he/she isn’t in the room causing you grief at this instant, why the discomfort? Are you remembering something he/she did in the past? Are you contemplating what he/she might do in the future?
How you feel right now is just that: how YOU feel. If this moment is unacceptable, change your relationship to it. Because it’s always this moment. Everything else is just thinking, remembering, planning–none of which is immediately “in your bones” the way this instant is. No one is coming along the rescue you. If you don’t feel comfortable being you from moment to moment, that’s about you. If something feels lacking right now, it will still feel lacking when you win the lottery or get your kids through school or finally renovate your kitchen. So be still. Take a breath. Watch your life happening one moment at a time, then tell me what needs further repair.
About the Author: James Robbins is a licensed professional counselor, published author and co-owner of Dallas Whole Life Counseling. He has over 15 years of experience helping people in various life stages that come from a wide variety of cultural, economic and family backgrounds. Learn more about his background by clicking here.