When Obama was elected, half of my clients felt the world was coming to an end. When Trump was elected, the other half of my clients felt the same way. Yet here we are. Earth still spins on its axis. Your dental hygienist still gripes at you for not flossing enough.
It’s human nature to blame our discontent on someone else. Favorite targets are political figures, bosses, spouses, family. Your life would be much better if only this or that person would change. The thing is, you never really experience other people. Not directly at least. The only thing you can directly experience is your own nervous system. Someone says something offensive. This is a small part of your problem. The bigger part is the way you replay these words in your mind, over and over, getting yourself riled up, feeling self-righteous.
Your mind is the root of your problems. Sit for five minutes. Close your eyes. Turn off your phone. Just watch what happens. Simply listen to your mental noise. You don’t quiet this noise by changing some political figure or fixing your spouse. You begin to quiet this noise by first recognizing it belongs to you. You take responsibility by becoming increasingly aware of your own internal experience. You learn to watch your thoughts go by without chasing them, without reacting, without rushing to do something. If you can’t make peace with your own thoughts, how can you make peace with the world?
