By Charles Jarvis, LMHC
As human beings, we strive for connection. We strive to share things with others, to be loved, to be accepted or included. We are creatures of habit, we survive in routines, in normalcy. But we are living in a world that is not normal, and many of us are disconnected as a result. Now the ongoing task of rebuilding yourself is paramount. We focus on ourselves, our families, and trying to have fun in a new world.
It is all too common to lose sight of ourselves. We are busy with paying bills, being present for our children, or dealing with the discord of people around us. We are surviving, and that is ok for now. But are struggling and it shows.
I was talking with a friend from work, and was shocked when he was unable to answer the question “what do you like to do for fun”. As a healthcare worker, it has been about the people we serve for so long, we tend to lose sight of ourselves. We tend to bond together as a family, but make sacrifices in our home lives. These sacrifices take a toll, and we are tired. So where does that leave us? The only option I see is renewal and growth.
Think about yourself, whatever the hardships you have endured – whether it be a divorce, death of a loved one, or just feeling disconnected from the world. What do you like to do for fun? And get back to it, safely. Focus on what makes you, you. Focus on what makes you feel refreshed and renewed. Focus on what makes you feel connected and part of something bigger, be as creative as you need to in this uncertainty of a world we live in.
I hope to ask my friend this same question in a few months, and I do expect a different answer – which he is aware of. We are not people who can work in a vacuum, we can only hold that line for so long. I told him to explore these thoughts, to meditate on these questions, and to start loving himself again. He smiled when we had this discussion, and I’m excited to hear his responses. In this ever changing world, we need to be mindful to focus on the positives. Focus on what’s important, and reconnect.
About Charles Jarvis, LMHC
Charles Jarvis is a licensed mental health counselor practicing in Massachusetts with a master’s degree in counseling psychology. He has been working in mental health since 2008 and has held a variety of critical roles. As a community hospital site manager, he has a specialized focus on those in the community experiencing mental health crises. In addition, he has worked in outpatient therapy, day, and community programs as well as specializing in populations with life-threatening symptoms. He enjoys talking to people with an aim to support his clients in their goal to achieve a better life experience.