by James Robbins, M.A., LPC A sincere apology is always a good place to start, but “making amends” is even better. Suppose you bark at your spouse for no good reason. Try this: Own your mistake. Simply say “‘I’m sorry I was irritable earlier. I realize it upsets you when I raise my voice.” […]
10 Red Flags When Dating a New Partner
1. He describes himself as a “momma’s boy.” She describes herself as a “daddy’s girl.” 2. He or she is married or “in the process of divorcing” when you begin dating. 3. This person complains often. Bad boss, crazy ex, selfish friends, whatever. Date this person long enough, and you will certainly find yourself added to […]
You Are Not Your Stuff
by James Robbins, M.A., LPC What does the stuff you own say about you? Not much. Imagine if everyone wore exactly the same standard-issue jumpsuit. Everyone was given the exact same car to drive, an identical copy of the same home to live in. You couldn’t “express yourself” via these objects. You couldn’t display your social status or […]
What’s the Best Way to Influence Your Romantic Partner?
by James Robbins, M.A., LPC When we don’t get what we want from our romantic partner, we tend to punish him or her. It’s our way of “training” our partner to better meet our wants and needs. We withhold sex and affection. We become emotionally unavailable, spend more time at the office. We criticize, complain, […]
Scheduling Bad Behavior
by James Robbins, M.A., LPC When are you next scheduled to misbehave? And by “misbehave,” I mean drink too much, eat too much, lie to your spouse, lose your temper–whatever bad habits you’re trying to work through. Probably you don’t have these items on your official “to do” list. Yet, they still get done, and […]
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