As a therapist, I often ask myself a fundamental question: Is there some essential trait or circumstance that my happiest, most well-adjusted clients have in common? It’s certainly not financial success or professional accomplishments. It’s not religious affiliation, or lack thereof. It’s not physical beauty or even health. It’s not having a big supportive family or being… CONTINUE
The Wisdom of Uncertainty
“I don’t know.” There is incredible power and creative potential in these three little words. Yet it’s in human nature to avoid them like the bubonic plague. By the age of 25, I felt I’d looked into most of life’s Big Questions and come away with some definite answers. By the age of 35, I’d… CONTINUE
Growing Beyond the Gold Star Mentality
When you’re in kindergarten and you behave well or you accomplish some task you get a gold star. In and of themselves, these gold stars are worthless. But they’re shiny, they represent your teacher’s approval and — perhaps most importantly — you stick them to a prominently displayed chart for your fellow students to see…. CONTINUE
Are You Playing Whack-a-Mole with Your Life?
Most people are waiting on something. Better job, financial freedom, better relationship, improved health, completion of a stressful project. Maybe the thing you’re waiting on will happen, maybe not. But even when you do finally complete that stressful project, for instance, what then? Then something else comes up. It’s like the whack-a-mole game: smack down… CONTINUE
Staying Centered when Everything Goes Wrong
by James Robbins, M.A., LPC Happiness is not a “cure” for unhappiness–no more than day is a “cure” for night. It’s human nature to seek more and more happiness while trying (rather desperately at times) to avoid unhappiness. But happy and unhappy are part of a natural cycle. Life is up. Life is down. Things… CONTINUE
10 Things Worth Knowing and 1 that Probably Isn’t
by James Robbins, M.A., LPC As a licensed professional counselor, a published author and co-owner of Dallas Whole Life Counseling I like to think I’ve learned a few things along the way. Here are just a few of the things that I have learned. They might surprise you… Wealthy people worry way more about money… CONTINUE
Does Mr. Happy Make You Sad?
by James Robbins, M.A., LPC They have a saying in India. “When a pickpocket meets a saint, all he sees are pockets.” While I am no saint, I do have a magic t-shirt. I’m not sure what makes it magic, but every time I wear it, people can’t help commenting. Rescued from the Walmart sales… CONTINUE
You Should Quit “Shoulding” Yourself
by James Robbins, M.A., LPC, Being a better person is highly overrated. It tends to involve a lot of “shoulds.” You should eat less salt. You should drive with your hands at 10 and 2. You should sit at least three feet from all electronic devices and never swim after eating spaghetti. In the therapy world, we… CONTINUE
The Magic Button Dilemma
by James Robbins, M.A., LPC, Suppose you had a magic button. If you push this button, you are guaranteed a blissful life from that point forward. You’ll get everything you want, and easily avoid the things you don’t. Would you push that button? Sure you would. But what if there was a catch? Suppose if… CONTINUE
What Arthur Brooks Can Teach Us About Happiness
Happiness Research An acquaintance of mine recently sent me a link to a very interesting video clip. In this clip, Arthur Brooks, president of the American Enterprise Institute, summarizes the last four decades of research regarding happiness. Among the many fascinating tidbits Mr. Brooks shares, one especially grabbed my attention. He described a study examining… CONTINUE